The Babe

Just a little illustration I did with my stylus when I was in the mood to paint.

My E-Portfolio

About two weeks ago I put together an electronic portfolio for a job I was applying for. I never did get a call-back, but it's still up there. So take a look at if you want, and then let me know (back here at the Disclaimer) if there is something I should do to make it a lot better. Also, if you know someone who's looking for a guy, send 'em to my page. You know I would do the same for you.

http://rkinrade-eportfolio.blogspot.com/

Semantic Assult

Recently I had a war of words with my good friend Sky over the difference between a company and an association. This was fueled by a post on the ALFA blog Sky added which referenced a vote for America's most hated company. The winner of this informal poll was the Recording Industry Association of America. I argued that the RIAA could not be seen as a company whereas Sky posited that there is little difference between what I define as a company, and the work of the RIAA. Read the entire post here, and let me know what you think.

The Spam Heard Around the World

A while back I posted a bit of junk email regarding the UK Lotteries International Prize, an obvious scam which I thought was at least novel and a bit amusing. Turns out this has become the most popular search leading into my blog since I posted it.

As my long-time readers know I tend to keep tabs on who's visiting by regularly checking on my site-meter (or spy-meter as I like to call it). Well turns out a whole lot of other curious souls out there got this email and were interested on finding out more. I've gotten hits from 4 separate Nordic nations (Denmark, Sweden, Norway and Finland) several of the United States, France and "Serbia and Montenegro" (sic). Most of the searches involved the phone number, some of them the name of the contest. I too Googled a bunch of the information from this particular e-mail, not because I thought it was legit (okay, maybe I hoped it was just for a few seconds) but mostly to see if anyone had reported it as a scam. What a bizarre world we live in where someone can send you a piece of junk mail and you can post it, only to have people from all over the world visit you to see what you've written about it.

Also from the spy-meter files, another topic of interest lately has been a picture of a donkey that I used as an illustration for a piece I wrote in January of 2006. For some reason this picture came up in four separate searches from Spain, South Africa and the U.K. within a couple of days of each other—having never been, as far as I know, queried before. How weird is that?

Finally someone from Toronto today searched "Steve Demmings Idiot" and came across a letter I wrote condemning Mr. Demmings editorial in the Free Press last year that bemoaned Manitoba's missing the boat with respect to becoming a world-class call-shop haven. He or she wrote a lengthy comment on Mr. Demmings who has since become a consultant for the city of Thunder Bay. Since I doubt anyone will ever happen across that letter by accident I will publish the comment below. (Here's the link if you want to refresh your memory about what I wrote.)

After 'poisoning the well' in Manitoba in his Winnipeg Free Press puff-piece entitled: Manitoba's lack of motion Province missing boat attracting high-tech jobs, in which he was highly critical of the Manitoba government, Steve Demmings has been hired as Founding CEO by the Thunder Bay Community Economic Development Commission (CEDC). His solution to the ailing Thunder Bay Economy: Low-Paying Call Centre Jobs.

In a recent edition of ExportWise published by Export Development Canada, Steve Demmings was quoted as advocating low-paying call centre jobs in replacement of high-paying resource-based jobs such as those until recently plentifully available in Thunder Bay’s forestry and pulp and paper sectors.

The article entitled ‘Call Centres: Ringing in Profits’ reads as follows:

According to Site Selection Canada [Demmings’ personal consulting firm], in the last three years 166 call centres were established in Canada, creating about 50,000 jobs. Of these, 60 per cent were smaller call centres located in tier two and tier three cities, with up to 300 employees. This would indicate an emerging opportunity in the smaller centres such as Thunder Bay, Sault Saint Marie, Bathurst and Sydney.

"We have a strong infrastructure and a growing reputation for delivering quality service at an affordable price. The next step is to focus on education and training, especially in those resource-based communities where industries are dying. This is a great opportunity to build our skill level and give people meaningful jobs at decent salaries of $40,000 to $60,000 a year," says Demmings.

I don’t know what I find more reprehensible, the fact that Mr. Demmings clearly doesn’t understand the fact that call centres only pay their employee operators between $8.00/hr and $11.00/hr (i.e. $16,640 and $22,880 per year respectively based on a 40-hour work week), or the fact that notwithstanding Mr. Demmings’ palpable lack of understanding of the economic development needs of the City of Thunder Bay, that the CEDC has nonetheless hired Mr. Demmings to lead Thunder Bay out of economic decline. From 'Call Centre Salesman' to 'Chief Economic Development Officer', this bubble-blower's product is still the same old snake oil.

SOURCE: http://www.edc.ca/english/publications_10819.htm

Seems that someone out there has a bit of a bone to pick with Mr. Demmings. All I can say is that I'm glad he's someone else's problem now. Good riddance!

Stolen Cars

Here's another article I wrote for submission to the Free Press. I don't know if they will publish it, there were already two good opinions on this topic in Sunday's paper, so maybe it will just be for the exclusive pleasure of the readers of The Disclaimer.

Two separate and spectacular incidents of “joyriding” last week have me thinking a lot about the nature of these crimes and wondering what it all means.

In the first incident, involving two Cadillac Escalades, I was tempted to see a twisted form of divine justice—poor kids getting even by smashing up two luxury vehicles. I hate big ostentatious automobiles with a passion, the motivation to own such wasteful spectacles, to me, is a clear indication of a society whose values are seriously wrong-headed, The very idea of celebrating and displaying one’s status by owning an SUV worth in excess of $75,000 is utterly abhorrent to me.

So though this spree caused a host of incidental damage I was captured by the idea that these were the actions of some hopeless bunch of kids who had no access to a strong role model at home, who didn’t see the point in playing by the rules of a society that seemed dead set against them, and who ended up taking their frustrations out on a pair of well-to-do Winnipegers with repulsive taste in transportation.

Of course I had no way of knowing who these kids were, or what their circumstances might be. My reflections on the injustice of life in a city where chronic poverty is routinely ignored by latte slurping, SUV driving yuppies are not based on hard facts, they are merely unfiltered judgments I am guilty of indulging in. For all I know these could have been bored sub-urban kids encouraged by too many violent video games.

Yet I clung to the idea, in spite of the nearly universal cry for stronger youth laws and harsher punishments, that somehow we were reaping what we had sown. As if fêting one’s wealth and advantage in the form of a modern day gilded chariot was a form of hubris the gods had finally decided to punish.

Then I read about an incident involving a stolen Sunbird trying to run down a group of early morning joggers. The perpetrators of this incident were not merely reckless, they were downright pathological. Again the facts in this case are few, but one must imagine these guys were high on something, how else to explain such irrational and inhuman actions?

I was forced to reconsider my natural “soft-on-crime” instincts. This act had finally angered me and let me see the red that most of Winnipeg was already seeing. What on earth would cause someone to steal a vehicle and attempt to play chicken with a group of innocent strangers? How could the moral fibre of any human person be so thinly weaved?

The compassionate instincts of the current justice system are well and good, but because they are not re-enforced by a caring and nurturing society they end up being completely misplaced and useless. Those who cry for vengeance in the face of crimes like these—and I admit that in the second case vengeance starts to seem like an appropriate response—are often unwilling or unable to recognize their own culpability; but it is equally true that those who commit these offences do so seemingly without fear of consequence, and must be held in check somehow, lest we all learn to live in fear.

Our laws seem to view our society as being more mature than it is, which is noble, but unfortunately not a remedy for the realities we live with. We are a highly individualistic and often indifferent people who quite naturally breed defiance among the mostly forgotten multitude of dispossessed youth who have no appropriate role models, and no way of understanding or expressing their circumstances.

The lawlessness that results from our ailing social order is not a product of soft sentences, but it is clearly not helped by them. So reluctantly, I am starting to realize that punishment and long term incarceration are the only possible options. After all, rehabilitation and redemption can only be accomplished in societies that believe that humanism and social justice are more worthwhile goals than glorifying the right to drive golden carriages.

Another Internet Scam

Okay, this isn't a very original post, but I find these scam e'mails really amusing, and I'm kind of glad to finally be getting some. They are far more clever than your basic Viagra spam, and yet fake in such an obvious way so as to be funny. I don't remember entering a lottery for an international prize in the UK, so unless some kind citizen bought a ticket for me and knew my e'mail well then... it can only be bullshit. Having said all that, anyone who reads the e'mail and wants to collect my prize is more than welcome. I might reply just for fun again.

FROM: THE DESK OF THE PROMOTIONS MANAGER,
INTERNATIONAL PROMOTION/PRIZE AWARD DEPARTMENT,

REF: UKNL/26510460037/07.
BATCH: 24/00319/IPD.

ATTENTION: Sir/Madam
RE/AWARD NOTIFICATION: FINAL NOTICE
We are pleased to inform you of the announcement
Today, 7th March 2007, of winners of the UK NATIONAL
LOTTERY, THE UNITED KINGDOM INTERNATIONAL PROGRAMS
held on 1st March 2007 in Croydon,London.
You email address was attached to ticket number
023-0148-790-459, with serial number 5063-11 drew
The lucky numbers 43-11-44-37-10-43, and consequently
Won you the lottery in the 2nd category.
You have therefore been approved for a lump sum pay
Of 500,000.00 British Pounds(GBP) in cash credited to file REF
NO. UKNL/26510460037/07. This is from total prize money
Of 2,000,000.00 British Pounds(GBP) shared among the four
International winners in this category.
To file for your claim, please contact our fiduciary
Agent;

NAME: DAVID WOOD.
#247 Edgware Road,
London W2 1EY
United Kingdom.
TELEPHONE: +447031923807
+447031972486
FAX: 0044 871 715 1331
Email: davidwood79@yahoo.com.hk

Congratulations again from all our staff and thank
You for being part of our promotional lottery program.
Sincerely,
Dr Leon Ethan
Zonal Co-ordinator

Practicing What I Preach

Here is an article I submitted today after stating my duty/goal/desire (in the last entry) to write more:


Last week it was revealed that the Employment Insurance fund contained a surplus of $51 billion. There wasn’t much of a brouhaha over this astonishing number, largely because it has been accumulating for years, and perhaps because in times of prosperity no-one seems to want to think too much about unemployment.

I for one have been thinking about unemployment quite a bit lately. Every day in fact. Actually unemployment and its near relation under-employment have been ongoing themes in my life ever since I entered the workforce as a burger flipper and potato peeler nearly 20 years ago. Despite having acquired a handful of post-secondary credentials, and a record of being agreeable and reliable on the job since then, the labour market and I have never been much better off as friends. Right now we are barely on speaking terms.

In my time I have had the rare luck to collect Employment Insurance on a few occasions. Though the qualifications have grown increasingly stringent and the benefits progressively paltry, I am living proof that some people actually do make on to the rolls of EI from time to time.

Of course the selection process for this stipend is rigorous and painfully slow. It has been designed to weed out anyone who might conceivably be considering it as a holiday from a hectic life, or escape from a dismal and unfulfilling work environment. Quitters and part-time workers are not welcome, and anyone who can supplement the basic amount they receive is penalized to ensure they remain wanting while at the behest of the government dime. Judging by the current surplus Employment Insurance laws have been extremely successful in keeping all but the most determined and desperate Canadians off the rolls, even in times of need.

For those whose stars happen to align in favour of EI benefits, a whole new course of delightfully archaic procedures awaits. Despite the truckloads of money this program provides to the federal government through premiums, finding current and useful resources within the governing Ministry of Human Resources and Social Development— especially those provided by a live person—remains elusive.

The talent for gaining appropriate council while collecting or awaiting Employment Insurance is a bit like having a knack for receiving favourable advice from Delphic Oracle. Many intricate rituals, mostly involving a specific sequence of numbers entered into a telephone keypad must be followed. Enduring long periods of sacrificial waiting for the next available agent to the tragic wail of some horribly mutilated one-time pop hit are required. Failure to ask the right question can result in a confusing and often misunderstood riddle as dispensed by a distant operator. Only when one has made a genuine dedication, can they obtain an in-person prophecy from on of the mysterious sages that preside over the HRSDC alter, and even then the news can be less than auspicious.

The adoption of the Internet has added a whole new layer of complexity and non-human interaction to the mix. Now you can be thoroughly confused and disheartened in both official languages without ever stepping foot inside an HRSDC office or listening carefully to all the available options. The complete canon of baffle-gab is available through a labyrinth-like series of links, the main advantage being that it does not require the purification ritual involving screeching violins and melancholic Moogs bleating out tributes to The Beatles and CCR.

Unfortunately the majority of criticism regarding the current surplus—estimated by senior bureaucrats within the department to be approximately $36 billion beyond what is needed to ensure the stability of the program—has focused on the opinion that EI premiums should be significantly reduced in the coming Conservative budget. This may be so, but it is also true that the program as a whole needs to be redefined. Employment Insurance should be rededicated to bringing more high-skilled and motivated workers into the economy by helping Canadians overcome their struggle to find consequential careers, rather than acting as a Kafkaesque castle of indifference where one’s grave and pertinent petitions are treated like prayers being carelessly shovelled into a great beyond.

New Poem

As I typed this it started to take a shape, so I've uploaded it is an image to preserve the spacing of the original. It will probably be easier to read if you click on the picture to get a bigger image.

Get the Greens into the debate

Today I received this link from a friend. It is from the national wing of the Green Party of Canada encouraging citizens to sign a petition in favour of allowing the Greens to participate in the next round of televised pre-election debates. If you agree that the Greens ought to be invited click here to sign the petition.

The Ethics of Meat

I’ve flirted with vegetarianism in my past. At the time I stopped eating meat it was an issue of economy more so than ethics. It was just cheaper to buy beans and tofu than chicken and beef.

I have since re-embraced my inner meat-lover, even though I am barely better off now than I was in my starving post-post-secondary years. But the more I read about how animals are farmed, the less likely I am to eat certain kinds of meat.

An editorial in Sunday’s Winnipeg Free Press opined that those who call for the ethical treatment of livestock are really just acting as a front for those who wish to end all livestock production. But this seems like a ridiculous argument in light of the fact that most humans continue to eat meat, and will continue wanting to no matter what strategies fringe animal rights groups bring to bear on public opinion.

It is possible for meat eating consumers to embrace the concept of free-range eggs and open hog barns without siding with the maniacs at PETA. It is in fact a highly logical and ethical stance to take. No one should begrudge farmers their living, but at the same time everyone should concern themselves with farming practices that seem cruel and poorly conceived.

I am not a wealthy person, but I won’t blink an eye when I spend an additional eighty cents to buy eggs that are “free run.” I have this idea that an animal who is raised in a suffocating and stressful environment is in someway unhealthy, and to eat the flesh or offspring of such an animal is unhealthy too. I have no way to prove my concerns scientifically, but intuitively it makes sense to me. I’m not sure to what degree an animal is aware of it’s being, but I am certain that no living thing, especially one destined to end up in my gullet, benefits from a life in a steel cage without any chance to roam and forage.

Like all sectors of our economy the agriculture business has become obsessed with the ideas of cheaper, faster and more. But while the widget factory may benefit from a streamlined production cycle, cutting corners in food production is illogical. Developing genetically similar pigs to better suit mechanized slaughter houses and then stuffing them with antibiotics because they have no natural resistance to disease seems like a really bad idea. Likewise farmed salmon aside from being less tasty than the wild version also threaten local populations with sea lice and competition for habitat when they escape their pens. That seems like too steep a price to pay for a slightly cheaper salmon steak.

Farming advocates can dream up all the conspiracy theories they want as to who is questioning their production methods and why, but the truth is that these methods do require scrutiny. In the end it is consumers who will decide what processes are ethical enough to support, and which need to be amended or abandoned altogether. However in order to make these decisions we must know how our food is being produced, and the real price we are paying for cheaper meat products.

An opinion on racial profiling

Today I sent a letter to the editors of the Free Press with respect to one they had published.

Original letter:

Life in the 21st century

Re. Humiliation in the name of public safety, Feb. 4.

Perhaps Janine LeGal missed Sept. 11 a few years back. Yes, racism is ugly. Death is uglier. Once again someone is crying foul because we have the audacity to attempt to protect ourselves from "marginalized groups from certain countries" that simply want us destroyed.

It is extremely unfortunate that her friend and others are subject to this scrutiny, but how do we protect ourselves against a cult of death that has brainwashed some Muslims into thinking that we of the West are not worthy of life? It is a fact that immigration is a positive for this country, but we still have to be aware that the world is not safe or fair. I believe that LeGal's friend's inconvenience is a small price to pay so that his/her fellow fliers can get on a plane with some sense of security that they will actually get to their destination without becoming collateral damage in a senseless war of ideology.

This is life in the 21st century. Deal with it. It's not going to get easier.

My response:

Far more disturbing than the remote possibility of another 9/11 is the idea that every North American who is dark and Muslim should be subject to degradation and suspicion every time they pass airport security.

Letter writer Gary Billson opines that in the 21st century racial profiling is in the interest of public safety, however I would argue that air travel is already significantly safer, and the odds of someone commandeering a commercial aircraft for an act of terror in this post 9/11 world are as slim as they are for getting a bomb in the cargo hold after Air India.

Sensible, one might say hyper-vigilant, controls have been put in place, and every new perceived threat is met with even harsher restrictions (witness the ban on liquids). In fact it is probably more likely that one will be killed in a school shooting or a Picktonesque act of serial murder than in an air terror incident. The practice of isolating and interrogating Muslim Canadians is far more of a threat to our nation then the possibility that one of them may be planning—let alone capable of—carrying out an act of terror on a domestic flight.

9/11 was a tragedy, but it was also an anomaly. It should never be used as a justification for turning fellow citizens with a different skin colours and/or religious background into assumed enemies of the state without a lick of due process.

Rick Mercer Photo Challenge Entry

Here is an image I created for Rick Mercer's Photo Challenge today. The original picture is here. Not sure who the political figure is--perhaps someone who watches TV might inform me--but the body of the picture belongs to Iron Maiden's lead singer Bruce Dickinson.

NDP vs. ATM

The NDP has taken aim at ATM fees charged by Canadian banks. At issue is whether or not it is fair for Canadians to have to pay additional fees for accessing an ATM. In the case of using an ATM associated with their home bank there is no question that consumers should be exempt. The problem of whether banks should charge non-clients is more contentious, however a blanket no-charge policy would create a level playing field because all bank card users would benefit equally.

A majority of Canadians pay some form of service fees for the privilege of doing business with their bank, those service fees should include unlimited ATM access for all. Wealthier Canadians already enjoy immunity to many of the charges associated with ATM and debit card use by virtue of minimum balance accounts and other strategies that allow them to avoid user fees. It is only fair that banks extend some of these same privileges to all of their customers, regardless of income.

The banks contend that it costs money to maintain the machinery and network used to provide the instant teller system. Interestingly though, private ATM providers—which now control over 70% of the instant cash machine market in Canada—often charge the same $1.50 “convenience fee” as the banks and yet manage to make a handsome profit in the process.

The banks continue to cling to this justification however, insisting that the charges protect the interests of their own clients who would otherwise bare the costs for outsiders to use their bank’s machines. This argument is clever but misleading; if there were no charges then the customer of one particular bank would be free to use any other bank’s machine at will and therefore the costs and benefits would more-or-less offset.

The banks have also cited the unprecedented growth of the private ATM industry to demonstrate that Canadians are willing to pay additional fees to access cash. This may be so, but it is also possible that the explosion of private ATMs is a response the shutting down of so many local bank branches across Canada. Just as instant loan shops have flourished in places where traditional banking is no longer available, so too do private ATMs fill a service gap for people who’s communities are effected by closures.

It is no longer possible to exist in this country without somewhere to at least deposit and access money. Employers don’t often pay in cash, and the coffee can is just not a safe enough place to store one’s life-blood. However, as we are all aware, banks are businesses first, and their primary directive is to improve the bottom line.

The affordability and fairness of service fees is not a consideration for most banks, other than with respect to how these features translate into their ability to compete with other institutions. This open-market struggle can be a good thing for the ordinary consumer, but if all the banks agree that a fee should be imposed universally there is no evading it.

The NDP’s proposed policies on service fees may well smack of populist political posturing, but at the same time they do address the frustration and entrapment many Canadians feel toward banking fees in general, and ATM “convenience fees” in particular. These small measures will have no effect on the systematic complexities imposed by the public necessity for banking vs. the banks’ desire to remain preposterously profitable in perpetuity, but they do at least tackle a noteworthy consumer issue that can be amended through legislation.

Can Paranoia Save the World?

For the second year in a row, President Bush’s State of the Union address proposed a highly rational reason to reduce America’s dependency on oil without acknowledging the global warming argument. While Bush’s continuing denial with respect to climate change may be seen as ignorant or downright idiotic to a growing number of citizens world-wide who see the environment as the key issue of our century, one need not chide Bush too harshly for his stance.

According to the president the best reason to treat America’s addiction to oil is to stem it’s reliance on foreign sources, primarily in the Middle East, which pose a grave security and economic threat. Xenophobic as this argument appears it is nonetheless a useable one. Any guiding principle that will lead to a reduction of reliance on fossil fuels must be embraced.

The oil industry and rogue environmental scientists (many who probably receive “research grants” from these giants) have done a world class job of marketing the idea that perhaps this global warming thing is not happening at all. Conservative economists too have done their part to ensure that the public is aware that a massive change in our energy policies—as proposed for example by the Kyoto accord—would devastate our economy and send millions to the poorhouse.

While it is true that Canada’s New Government has had to seriously rethink it’s policy of “we’ll tackle the environment problem with a 50-year reduction scheme,” and in the process replaced a lapdog minister with one of the government’s biggest stars, it is equally true that many politicians, industry leaders and citizens continue to take a wait and see approach.

For example: how many fewer cars are we seeing on the streets of Winnipeg these days? Did the mayor and council who killed rapid transit pay for it at the polls? Are there any new houses being built in this city that weigh in at less than 2000 square feet? Has the provincial government any intention of encouraging the abandonment of livestock production? Are there plans to institute an environmental levy on domestic and international flights?

On paper the issue of climate change appears to be the most serious challenge of our young century. And yet, despite the posturing of many Western governments and individuals there has been little in the way of making the kind of monumental sacrifices that are required to curtail the problem.

Bush’s reasoning may seem specious to many outside of the United States, and the fact that it comes from someone who is so broadly abhorred probably doesn’t help the situation. But the major point is that Bush has found a marketable justification on which to pin the need to reduce fossil fuel consumption. True, it plays on the terrornoia and isolationism that seem to be taking over twenty-first century America, but we do tend to live in a Machiavellian world where calculated deception is a far more powerful and fast acting tool than international accord.

The cynical, self-serving policies of a Bush have a far better chance of seeing the light of day than consensus driven, morally based initiatives such as Kyoto. Much as we admire activists like David Suzuki everyday people respond to men like Bush. Weighing the arguments and making decisive moral sacrifices is too much to ask of ordinary people today. What is needed is a man of action with pragmatic and concrete answers that bear little or no scrutiny. While the prospects of climate change may still be debated, and what to do about it may be harder still to comprehend, the idea that foreign oil is a threat to America is a relatively easy sell.

So while Bush’s legacy is in serious jeopardy it has much more to do with some bad choices, or what his sympathetic biographer might label as over-ambitious schemes, than his style. I think it is almost commendable that Bush has found a way to address one of the world’s major concerns without admitting being wrong about anything, a gesture he—like his equally unpopular predecessor Nixon—would be utterly incapable of in any event.

Dr. Nehu Responds

Here is what my African con artist friends had to say in response to my email (posted yesterday):

Dear R. W. McWilliams

A very happy and prosperious 2007 to you.

I want to make it very clear to you that you are dealing with a responsible man who has the fear of God,therefore you should not see my involvement in this transaction as an evil act rather it is a perfect act of God.

Infact I am very glad for your response and also many thanks for your concern towards the actualisation of this transaction I encourage you not to relent your effort in this business because this is not something that took me unaware, rather it is what I have studied properly, I will direct you in every proceedures till you confirm the fund in your position.

I found my self in a society that has no value for any individual that is the Government of my country after rendering them your sincere service for many years on your retirement there will be no adequate compensation, rather they will frustrate you to an extent that you will almost be a nuisance in the same society which you previously served sincerely.

Please my dear, I do not want to take you so far but I want you to know that a strong force compelled me to take this decision to execute this deal because I have seen that the situation of things in my society is not conducive enough for me to stay further and watch my good talent wasted.

These are the reasons when I discovered this opportunity during my auditing I saw it as a gift/compensation from our merciful God and I quickly went into fasting and prayers for many weeks seeking for the support of Almighty God and a sincere fellow who will assist me honestly to realise this goal.

So all I need from you now for the actulization of this transaction is for you to fill the below text of application and submit it immediately to the department e-mail address to enable them start the process of approving the fund.I promise that all this process will take us about 10 working days depending when you submitted the application.

May the ALMIGHTY God continue to guide and protect us in all our doings, I
demand that, truth, honesty,sincererity and confidentiality should be our CODE WORD in this transaction as you can see that I confined much in you as my confident/the reciepiant of this fund till I arrive in your country.

I will not want you to seat on the fund when it is finally in your position. I am Looking forward for your urgent response and make sure you give me your international passport or national/working identity card . Do your best to call me on my direct line when you send the application,to enable me monitor things right here in the bank and be given you feed back,I need your private phone number for easy communication and emergency.

My First Nigerian Scam

The Nigerian Scam is an infamous con that has been running around the Internet pretty much since day one. I'm actually surprised that it is still effective, because it's a bit of a pop culture phenomenon you'd think everyone would be onto. Nonetheless, I suppose it's always worth it for a criminal mastermind to throw out the bait. You never know what will come back. Here is the letter I received:

BANK OF AFRICA (BOA)
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO,
WEST AFRICA.
BANK WEB SITE:www.bkofafrica.net

Dear friend,
I am Dr.Samailla Nuhu. the Director in charge of Auditing section Bank OF AFRICA(BOA Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso in West Africa. Forgive My indignation if this message comes to you as a
surprise.As it may interest you to know,I got your contacts through burkina online internet research.

I have decided to contact you on a project that will be very beneficial to both of us.During our auditing in this Bank,I came across some amount of money belonging to a deceased foreigner Mr.Sheu Yuan-dong who died with his wife and their only daughter on February16,1998 in a plane
crash.The fund has been dormant in his account with this Bank without any claim of the fund in our custody from his relation before my discovery to this development.

He was the Governor of Taiwan Central(Reserve)Bank.The said amount is U.S$25.600,000.00 dollars(twenty five Million, Six Hundred Thousand US Dollars).I want you to know that I never master minded the death of the deceased fellow.

Their death was occured Naturally.Please View thiswebsite: http://www.cnn.com/WORLD/9802/16/taiwan.crash.update2/

For your information,your nationality will not pose any problem for the sucessful transafer of this fund
to you as bonafide next of kin.

I look forward to receive your urgent reply,more details will be given to you immediately you indicate
your willingness to assist me in this transaction.Urgent respond needed.

Yours truely,
Dr.Samuel Nuhu.

Obviously this is too good an opportunity to pass up. So I've created an email alias and sent a response. It reads:

Hello Dr. Nuhu,

I was very interested in the email you sent today, this is just the kind of opportunity I
have been waiting for. I am very excited at the possibility of making a lot of money! I
would prefer it if you send the information you promised to this email from now on since
my wife is very nosy about the email accounts she knows about.

Sincerely,
R. W. McWilliams

Successful conclusion to the parking lot escapade

Today I received a bank draft from the TD Canada Trust in Osborne Village for $61. Justice was served in the case of my unwarranted tow (see the previous "Missing Sign" posts below), reminding me once again what a powerful tool a well written letter/e-mail can be. I had no notion going into this little dust-up that I would be successful in getting anything other than another classic Disclaimer blog episode out of the whole affair, but as it turns out words can be worth small amounts of cash sometimes.

The Missing Sign, Part II

Legalities prevent me from publishing the response of the bank manager at TD Osborne Village (to the letter posted in "The Missing Sign" below). I will summarize his letter by saying he was fairly sympathetic in his tone but inferred that these spots were meant for ATM use and over-night deposits. He mentions that the signs do say "appointments only." He was conciliatory enough to offer to pay for half the tow, but upon advice from The Disclaimer's un-official legal department I opted to send another letter politely, but firmly, requesting the towing fee be paid in full. It reads as follows:

Dear Mr. Young,

Thank you for taking the time to address my concerns. I appreciate your taking interest in this matter as well as your willingness to compensate me for my trouble. I do believe however, given the circumstances, that a full reimbursement for the towing would be in order.

As you mentioned, the five signs in your portion of the lot do indicate that the stalls are reserved for "appointments only," but logically speaking appointments within the bank can only be made during banking hours. The use of ATM's and night deposit boxes, while valid reasons in themselves for maintaining 24-hour parking spaces, are not generally understood, at least in my vocabulary, to be an appointment. Had the sign said "for appointments, ATM users and after-hours deposits" it would have spelled out the restriction more clearly.

I hope you do not take me to be disrespectful. I am simply pointing out that when I parked my car in one of your stalls your bank had been closed for several hours, and it was my assumption that all appointments would have been done for the day. (Just as other merchants who reserve customer parking in that lot do so only up until the end of the business day.) Perhaps the missing towing signs indicate "no parking anytime," but again sir, it is within the responsibilities of yourself and/or your leasers to maintain these signs. It is unfair that I should have to bear any cost for the negligence of your landlords.

I am hopeful that you will see my side of things and offer me (perhaps in conjunction with the owners of the lot from whom you lease the spaces) a complete refund, at least for the towing portion of my misadventure.

I thank you for your reconsideration of this matter.

Sincerely,

Ryan C. Kinrade

My First YouTube Video

Actually someone else made this video with my camera, but it's from a party at my house, and I posted it, so technically it's mine.

The Missing Sign

Well my first post of 2007 is on a familiar theme, for any regular readers that I may have left (as my posts have been entirely sporadic for the last few months.) This post deals with having had my car towed from Osborne Village on Friday night. Being the vigilant, fine-hating soul that I am I would never willingly park in a spot that even modestly threatened a tow. I would rather park blocks away and walk. So when I had my car towed Friday it was a great shock to the system and sent a spasm of indignation through me. I decided to write the branch manager of the bank who's spot I parked on, to see if he would agree to refund the towing fee. Here is how the letter reads:

Dear Mr. Young,

I wanted to inform you of an unfortunate circumstance involving my vehicle and the parking in behind your branch. On Friday night I parked my car in the parking lot directly behind the Osborne Freehouse. Most of the spots in this lot are reserved only during business hours, and there was no signage present to indicate that the policy was different with regards to your particular area of the lot.

When I returned to my spot later that evening I noticed my car was no longer there. I was confused, because there was no sign to indicate if it had been towed or by whom--I even wondered if it had been stolen. I took a cab home and decided to investigate further the following day. When I returned the next morning I noticed the parking stalls you maintain against the back of your branch, which do have a sign indicating that they are patrolled by Tartan Towing. I called Tartan, and sure enough they had my car. It was then that I noticed that there was a sign post next to the spot where I had parked which probably would have stated (had it not been removed by vandals) that parking in these spaces is prohibited.

According to the City of Winnipeg Private Parking By-Law 6549/95 Section 3. (1):

Any owner, occupant, or person in charge or control of private property who wishes to take advantage of the provisions of this by-law for the purpose of keeping unauthorized persons from leaving vehicles on private property shall erect and maintain thereon signs indicating the identity and telephone number of the person or firm in charge or control of the private property who can be contacted in the event of impoundment...

In short it is your responsibility to maintain appropriate signage indicating that those spots are restricted, and that they are patrolled by Tartan Towing. Of course the towing fee, cab fare, brief moment of terror I felt when I thought my car had been stolen, along with the inconvenience of retrieving the vehicle are hardly worth a law suit, however I would encourage you to refund the small sum of 61 dollars (which is a significant amount to a person in my current financial situation) plus cab fare ($20) as a matter of principle and to act swiftly in the commissioning of a sign to replace the one that has been removed.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Sincerely,

Ryan C. Kinrade